Crying before I reached my bedroom, I slammed the door and collapsed next to my bed, sobbing in my arms. What have I gotten myself into? My thirteen-year-old self wonders as I hear the words of my step-mother re-playing through my mind. Clutching my anguish to my chest, I feel a wave a calmness wash over me. Lifting my head I watch my coral bedroom walls become a vast landscape showered in moonlight. Looking down at what was my bed a second ago, I see my arms resting on a stone ledge of a well with water as still as glass near the surface. Feeling my body start to tremble, I look past the well to an enormous tree aglow with light flowing in from the sky. Where am I? I wonder as I sit up, looking up at the sky. Trying to find the source of the light. Expecting to see a full-moon night sky, I see swirling clouds like chalk dust in shades of charcoal and lavender with threads of silver winking like stars as far as I could see.
“Where do you think you are?” Came a smooth baritone voice from my left.
Feeling my heart jump, I scramble back a few feet to look at where the voice came from. “Who are you?” Seeing my bedroom walls shimmer for a breath around me before becoming the vast landscape covered in strange moonlight. I see a tall, lean man with thick silver hair past his shoulders wearing a charcoal robe that covered all but his head and hands. His robe held closed with a silver chain belted around his waist with the tail falling mid-shin and ending with a large black ornament. That would always knock your shins, I thought to myself; searching his face for malice. But all I saw was the deep lines of age, deepening the bright lavender of his eyes as he looked at me with a curious smile. Faking confidence, I looked him square in the eyes. Tilting his head as if trying to listen, he slowly turned on his heel and walked toward the well; as if he was whistling.
“Do you know what this is?” Sweeping his hand over the well, rippling the water as if in a breeze.
“No.” Shaking my head, as I walked toward the well. Feeling calmer, I wiped my cheeks using my sleeve as I sat on the edge of the well. “Are you going to answer me?” Looking up at him with my elbows on my knees.
“Not yet.” Still looking at me with amused curiosity.
Unsure of what was going on, I move to sit sideways to stare at the humungous tree glowing in front of me. Mesmerized by the pulsing glow, I start to see shadows and flashes of light flickering outside the glow of the tree. “What are those?” Feeling my heart quicken.
Turning to look down at me; visually contemplating an answer.
“Tell me something,” feeling my unease grow.
Looking at me curiously from across the well, he smiled before saying, “They’re the lost souls and spirits trying to find their place here.” Watching my reaction.
“WHAT?” Scrambling to my feet, we lock eyes. “Where the hell, am I? Why aren’t I in my bedroom? And, WHO ARE YOU?” yelling with my fists on my hips, I stare down at him until I feel another wave of calmness go through me. Freezing me like a statue.
“Sit.” He gently commands, patting the edge next to him.
I slowly go to the edge, crossing my arms tightly over my chest as I sit an arm’s length away from him, facing the tree. Realizing that he was waiting for me to turn to him, I move sideways keeping the tree in the corner of my right eye.
“Look into the glass,” he said. Causing what I thought to be water to ripple below his hand.
Not sure if it was a trick, I slowly lean over the water keeping an eye on him before looking down to see my reflection. “What — “ Freaked out, “Where’s my reflection?” Turning away from the pool I look directly into his eyes only a few inches away from me. Paralyzed, I wait for him to speak.
“You don’t have a reflection here.” Holding my stare.
Feeling my breath stuck in my throat, I looked away at the ground. “What do you mean I don’t have a reflection here?” Taking a deep breath. “Where is here?” Getting my breath under control to look back at him.
Unsure of what I was going to see, I took one more deep breath and closed my eyes to calm myself before looking back down into the glass.
“Look over the glass.” Gesturing with his hand to a point across from me along the wall.
Resting my chin on my hands as I leaned on the edge, I fixed my eyes on a point where the glass is against the stone wall. Neither looking at glass or stone, I stare into what I would now consider black glass. Soon I started to see tadpoles of color swim before my eyes. Turning to look at the strange man next to me, he gestures for me to keep looking. As I stared, the tadpoles began combining and lengthening into snakes of red, green, and purple. “What is this?” Leaning back to look at the man nearly touching me. “What does all this mean?”
Leaning forward, with his hands on his knees and his nose nearly touching mine, he said, “Come with me.” Holding out his hand as he stands.
More curious than scared, I ignored his hand. Coming to the bottom of his nose, I have to look up to meet his eyes intensely looking down at me. “Will you tell me what’s going on and who you are?” Mirroring his intensity.
“I’ll tell you.”
Pausing with his hand over his mouth, I see an elegant black and silver bracelet hanging off his left wrist. “What — “ As I point at the bracelet he holds up a long slender finger telling me to wait.
“I promise I’ll tell you what you need to know.” Sounding more like a thought than a person.
“Need?” Catching the change in words. “What about what I want to know?”
“You will know what you need. What you want to know.” Shrugging. “Is up to you to find out.” Stepping away from me.
Miffed but feeling like I was getting somewhere, “Ok,” I said.
Nodding in acknowledgment, he held out his hand again and we began walking into the vast plain where the lost souls and spirits flickered around us.
Jerking awake at the side of my bed, I looked around my bedroom, Thank God, it was only a dream. Looking at the time, I got up and started doing my homework.
Listen below for a less than 10 minute talk on,
- Emotional Trauma
- Soul Work
- The Normalization of Emotional Abuse; and
- How To Emotionally Heal & Protect Yourself.
Ready to start Post 2? Click HERE to get started!